Angel Of The Morning - Juice Newton

It's My Nose's Birthday - Jimmy Durante (吉米·杜兰特)
The other night I'm walking home
And feeling so gay
When I'm walking home I'm always that way
What a home I got
The kitchen is delightful the living room is grand
And the bathroom is out of this world
Which makes it a little bit inconvenient
When I opened up my door I got the grandest surprise
All my friends were there and they began to harmonize
Wait a minute wait a minute
Curb your enthusiasm this isn't my birthday
No but it's the birthday of someone near and dear to me
It's my nose's birthday not mine
And I'm proud to say the snoz is doing fine
My nose was born upon this day in eighteen ninety three
Exactly two weeks later the stork delivered me
Was the first time that a nose outweighed the child
When I was born my dad took one look at my snoz and said
Stork take that back
Just because our country's emblem is an eagle
That don't mean we have to raise one
But in spite of my dad
The snoz and I are closer than David and pretentious
Not even a mustache has ever come between us
I tried to raise a mustache once and what happened
Nutting
It wouldn't grow in the shade
It's sabotage
But I'm as happy as I can be
Cuz it's my nose's golden adversary
Looking back over the years
The snoz and I weathered many a storm
I remember years ago my first train ride
I was on a lower birth when I decided to call the porter
So I stuck my nose out through the curtain and what happened
The porter came by grabbed my snoz and before I could pull it back in
He bruised it shined it polished and said
Now where's the other shoe
A big tear started to roll down my nose
And it's a brave tear that will start on a trip like that
I felt sorry for the snoz
But I'm proud of
Why
I'll tell ya
The snoz was never unreasonable
He'd never asked for no french rolled handkerchiefs
He didn't need no french rolled handkerchiefs
A whips of the cuff was enough
Yes and I'll never forget the time the snoz saved my life
I was one of those sultry weekends at the beach
I'm in the water swimming the Australian crawl
When I find myself face to face with a vicious swordfish
He was about to attack
But after taking a second look at me the swordfish said
I give up you're equipped with a superior weapon
So ya see
I'm as happy as I can be
Cuz it's my nose's golden anniversary
Yes it's my nose's golden anniversary