(The Legend of) Miss Baltimore Crabs (”Hairspray”) - Michelle Pfeiffer

(The Legend Of) Miss Baltimore Crabs - Michelle Pfeiffer
Front step
Cha cha cha
Back step cha cha cha
Side step
Front step
Back
And turn
Oh my god
Penny
There's link
Link
I can't believe
I'm really here auditioning
I can't believe
I'm really here watching you audition
Fron't step
Cha cha cha
Back step cha cha cha
Side step
Front step
Back and
Oh amber
Look at this motly crew oh
This town has sure gone
Down hill since
I was crowned miss
Oh mother not more ancient history
Oh my god how times have changed
This girls must be blind
Or completely deranged
But times seem to halt
When I was miss baltimore crabs
Amber that move is far too dirty
Mother wake up from
That dream of yours this isn't 1930
You can laugh but life's a test
Don't do this don't do that
Remember
Mother knows best
And the crowns in the vault from
When I won miss baltimore crabs
These steps are perfect ammunition
Let me show you how you mommy dear
Took out the competition
Girls go get
Boys let's rumba
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Those poor runner ups
Might still hold some grudges
They padded their cups
But I screwed the judges
Those broads thought
They'd win if a plate
They would spin in their dance
Ha ha ha not a chance
Boys put me down
Oh good morning ladies
Let's see what you got
Twist twist twist twist
Mashed potato mambo
Ready begin
On my show you'll never find
A thrusting hip or bump and grind
Whats that
A dance for flees and tics
Oh you should have seen my bag of tricks
I hit the stage
Batons ablaze
While belting aida
And preparing souflees
But that triple somersault
Is how I clinched miss baltimore crabs
Proceed
Are you scared we're on live
No I'm sure I can cope
Well this show isn't broadcast in
Cinema scope
I never drink one chocolate malt
No deserts for miss baltimore crabs
This one will never get a date
In those hand me down clothes
Ha kid she'll never get a date
Till daddy buy her a new nose
I would say
OI guvilut
If I wasn't miss baltimore crabs
Do you dance like you dress
Amber theres no need to be cruel
Would you swim in an integrated pool
I sure would I'm all 4 integration
It's the new frontier
Not in baltimore it isn't
And may I be frank
First impressions can be tough
And when I saw you I knew
If your size weren't enough
Your last answer just blew it
And so my dear
So short and stout
You'll never be in
So were kicking you out
With your form and your fate
O it isn't your fault
Just down with a case of
Miss baltimore crabs
Ergh you may go
I'm
Thank you
I think they secretly liked you
May I please audition
Of course not
But you can bow and exalt
'Cause I am miss baltimore crabs
Crabs crabs
Crabs