Your Husband’s Cheating On Us - Matraca Berg

She said honey you don't know me
But I know you
Do you mind if I come in
It'll only take a minute or two
And by the way I really like
What you've done to this place
It doesn't really surprise me
'Cause we kind of have the same taste
But that's enough small talk
There's something that we need to discuss
Your husband's cheating on us
She said you look surprised
Well I'm surprised that you never knew
I can't believe you didn't pick up
On my rather strong perfume
(It was Giorgio)
But anyway we've been replaced
And she's much younger than me and you
And she's out there with him now
Doing all the things that we used to do
So why don't we get together
You know we could be dangerous
'Cause your husband's cheating on us
Ah ah ah ah snakes are in the kitchen
Crows are on the line
Ah ah ah ah the weather vane is twitching
Can't you see the sign sign s-s-sign
This is where I start to cry
And she said honey you'll get over it
Just never mind my fantasies
Of cyanide or taking out a hit
On second thought it's better don't you think
To make him wish that he was dead
So promise me you'll take that creep
For everything he's ever had instead
I've got a Polaroid camera
And a room number at the Hotel Nautilus
Where your husband's cheating on us
He's cheating on us